Thursday, June 16, 2011

Choosing to Smile

This was just one of Lincoln's many appointments.  We have been very lucky, because Lincoln hasn't had any of the major medical problems that often accompany Down Syndrome.  His heart is healthy, he eats well, and is a great sleeper.  But Lincoln's needs have introduced us to a whole new schedule of baby appointments.  One of which includes making sure his heart continues to function well.  So, at two months old he visited the cardiologist for a EKG and echo-cardiogram.  Bree insisted on coming in with us, and held on to Lincoln to offer moral support.  He was perfect and calm through the long appointment.  He seemed far too small to be hooked up to all those leads, and when we were in the ultrasound room I almost lost it, seeing him lying on the hospital gurney.  But I am so thankful that he is healthy. 
I am told that I will never get used to the appointments.  The hassle of scheduling and referrals.  The worry that goes along with it.  Life is fragile.  This knowledge hovers in the back of my mind now more than ever, and it makes some days difficult to handle.  But it's also given me perspective, and a determination to focus on the good stuff.  So that's why I smile and snap photos like the crazy Mamarazzi, commemorating Lincoln's first EKG as if he were taking his first step.  Because I could look at him lying there and give in to the urge to cry... or I could choose to smile and think, "Look at you. Nothing's going to hold you back. Life is going to be awesome."

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